Ronnie Irani on the phone © Siddhartha Vaidyanathan

Ronnie Irani, the recently retired Essex captain, talking loudly on his mobile and after a point is not able to decide whether to get into his car or just stay out. At one point he opens the car door, begins to get in, head still out, mobile at his right ear, hollering … you get the picture.

Meanwhile Alastair Cook, England’s opening batsman, is checking out a bagful of golf clubs. Sleek, brand new ones but there’s just one problem: “They’re all right-handed.”

Danish Kaneria lurks outside the ground aimlessly, suddenly surprised when someone stops him to say hello: “Marwadoge yaar (you’ll kill me, man).