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March 13, 2006
Posted by on 03/13/2006
The ghost of Botham's mother-in-law
So England lose the Test and with it, most likely, the series. It will be a hell of an effort to win in Mumbai, traditionally a turner.
It was hard to pin down but something seemed lacking in England’s performance. Not effort or skill, but edge. No one really tried to rile the Indians, as England did at times last summer by throwing the ball at Australian batsmen, or very deliberately withholding sympathy when they were hit by bouncers. This time there was hardly any chirrup in the field. There were no sledges. There weren’t even any meaningful glares.
Now some would simply say "thank goodness for that". But, leaving aside the question of the rights and wrongs of trying to bully your opponent, there remains a question. If it was OK to direct it at the Australians, why not India?
There might be nothing in it, but you couldn’t help wondering whether this is because, even at some subconscious level, England are painfully aware of the bad impression they left on some previous trips to the subcontinent.
Over the years we’ve had wisecracks about mothers in law and about local “buffoons” in the press box. We’ve had dodgy prawns. Weakened sides. Hardship bonuses. A nasty incident where a local autograph hunter had his fingers trapped in a kicked-shut door. England’s track record on the subcontinent is not good, with locals left with a picture of closed minds and closed hotel doors. (Incidentally, England are not the only ones: Allan Border’s bored Australians once took to dropping rupees from their hotel balcony to enjoy the ensuing scramble.)
Quite properly England are trying to put things right. They have tried hard to show a more open mind and a more friendly face. In the Vaughan era, not a tour to the subcontinent has gone by without a high-profile trip to a local charity project.
Outside Asia, things have been rather different. Last winter England went to South Africa, didn’t give a damn what people thought of them, and won. In fact they riled the locals in a pretty big way. In Australia it’s no-holds-barred. But, on the face of it, there seems to be a kind of underlying feeling that you can’t get really nasty on the subcontinent.
Now England’s results in Asia were dreadful long before the charm offensive. And Steve Waugh was renowned, even revered, for his interest in India and for his charity work – but it didn’t stop him being an awkward so and so on the field. Perhaps over-aggression is just not the path England think will lead to victory here. And I am not suggesting that to succeed on the field you have to be an ill-mannered berk off it.
But there is a lingering feeling that in trying to avoid the horror stories of the past, England might – and it really is a big “might” – have got a little too nice on the field.
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