Before the Ashes can begin, there is the major task of getting the England squad kitted and fitted in the Hugo Boss suits. Adrian Deevoy of the Observer attends the fitting where KP asks for better suits than last time, Cook reveals Anderson is dressed by his wife and Swann fails to get a date.
Nothing can prepare a person for the sheer loftiness of SCJ Broad. His head all but grazes the door frame as he lollops in from the hotel restaurant end. Before Broad's arrival, Cook had already warned us that the 6ft 6in son of Ashes legend Chris Broad was no stranger to the mirror. "Vain," Cook insisted. "Absolutely loves himself."
This opinion is later confirmed by an anonymous off-spinner. "The blond, floppy hair. The height. The boy-band good looks that all the 16-year-old girls go for. And he's lovely with it. I've often said to him if he had a pair of breasts, I'd fancy him too. But generally, I just want to punch him in the face. But you can't reach."
After a horror start to his Test career, Ravi Bopara is reeling off centuries for fun. He could be England's star of the world T20 but he already has one eye on the Ashes, writes Richard Rae in the Independent on Sunday.
"My approach nowadays is more, if it's your day it's your day, and if it's not, it's not. Even in a Test match, if you've done all the work and prepared yourself as well as possible. So if I'm facing Mitchell Johnson, I've faced left-armers in the nets, round the wicket, over the wicket, I've done everything I can to prepare. Then if it's my day, great, and if it's not, then maybe it will be next time."
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